Joy Comes in the Mourning?

                                               
       

   Weeping may stay for the night,  but joy comes in the morning.

    

   Hear, Lord, and be merciful to me; Lord, be my help... You turned my wailing 

   into dancing.  (Psalm 30)

                                           
                             

                                       

          Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.   (James 1:2,3)

This  morning at the Women's Retreat at our church with speaker Jen Wilkins, the words   

morning and mourning jumped off the screen to me as we gathered in worship.  The worship was pure joy for me at least, and for many other women from what I could tell by the looks on their upturned faces, voices lifted in harmony, and hands raised in emotion to heaven.   It was a time of worship with nothing else to do for the moment but to focus on His beauty and mercy and goodness.  Surely this is going to be some of what heaven is like; time to worship freely with nothing but joy bursting like a sunrise inside of you with sounds you could listen to forever.   

     But of course, focused worship may only be for the moment here on earth.  And, as I return home, to clothes that need to be washed, furniture that needs to be dusted, supper that needs to be cooked, and the dog that needs letting out, I choose to spend just a few more moments in worship through the power of the pen.  I choose to let the rest go for now - well, I did let the dog out - and crystallize this moment in time where I have a blissfully quiet house and can reflect on the Word and worship that was so artfully presented this morning.

     As I reflect on those two words and verses I wonder, seriously, does joy come in the morning...after mourning?  Can we really consider it pure joy when we face trials of many kinds, knowing that the testing of it will develop perseverance?  Is that the only way to grow?  Is that the answer to the age-old question of "Why does God allow suffering?" ... so that we develop perseverance?  Isn't there any other way to grow?

    Maybe not...  Maybe it is through mourning that we mature.  It could be mourning for  words spoken in anger, for the loss of a loved one,  for a job that is less than perfect, for the house that never seems to stay straightened, for the pain in the midst of the marriage that you thought would complete you, for the mistakes of the past, for the unfulfillment of a dream.  Mourning can come in many packages.  Mourning comes with life, just as the sun rises every morning.  There will be a time to mourn for all of us.  Major mourning, and minor mourning.  But mourning never-the-less.  

    We learned this morning of such mourning as we looked at the stories of three women in the bible:  Rahab, who was considered a no-account for her prostitution that was more than likely not of her choosing; Leah, who never felt like enough next to her beautiful sister Rachel and was thrown into a loveless marriage; and Sarah, who spent her life childless until she was "as good as dead".   All three were mentioned in the Hebrews 11 Christian "Hall of Fame".  In fact,  every person listed in Hebrews 11 endured a time of mourning.  All of them "did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance...Instead they were longing for a better country - a heavenly one."  (Hebrews 11:13, 16) 

     Right from the start of His revealed Word, God is presented to us as a Resurrection God,  one who created the morning and brought the joy from the mourning of  Sarah, and Abraham, and Leah, and Rahab, whether in heaven or earth.  Theirs were all resurrection stories.  

     Can that not bring a joy to us even within our present mourning - the deep, abiding belief that one day all will be right?   It may be a lifetime of waiting - as for Sarah and Abraham, or 40 years as for the Israelites, or for the endless years of waiting to be rescued by Rahab, or for the declaration of  being cancer-free after rounds of debilitating chemo, or for the tension release of finally being given the strength of granting forgiveness for a real offense well up in you after the bitter taste of unforgiveness that continued  too long without release.  Or sometimes it is never alright on earth; only in heaven will we receive healing. 

   But can that joy somehow be here on earth even when deeply buried by mourning that seems to continue forever?  

     It  took me many years to understand that joy in the midst of unwelcome circumstances.  I am still growing in faith to be able to recognize it is there when I'm thrown into the pit of mourning on this earth.   But just as the sun rises each morning, I believe there is always the joy of being able to possess the peace that passes understanding  whether in heaven or on earth.  And I will keep seeking it - through the Son who brings the joy of the morning to each of us who seek Him with all our might.  

Joy Comes in the Mourning?

Consider it joy?  Lord, even this?

I wonder if I'll ever again feel bliss. 

I'm cold and numb, I can't find my way.

Will I even survive another day?

Joy comes in the morning? 

Will I ever see the dawn?

Darkness seems to be in all 

  the cards I've drawn.

I can't see past the pit

And though I'm sure of it,

My faith seems just in my head.

All I can feel is dread.  

Yet, now that I grow still

I begin to feel a trill 

Of a dim song deep within

That I've heard through thick and thin.  

I remember this faint melody 

Buried way down deep inside of me.
Then despite this pain,
I begin to gain

A perspective on which to lean.
And  I begin to slowly glean
That You are there, You are there!
You've promised that you care.
You have always been where

My greatest needs rise.
How can I but surmise
That You will use this for my good?
No matter how I could

Imagine the outcome... 
What I want or something from
The pit of hell to torment me.
What is the worst that could be?
Will I ever be free

Of the pain that is real?
It's all I can feel.
Yet I know, yes I know
That though the hurt is slow
To recede
You are all that I need. 

And this mourning deep inside
Will cause me to abide
Until that day on earth or above
That I once again feel the joy of your love.

For now in the night
I wait in my plight
Knowing the morning always comes
With the joy that is from
You who holds the light
And will deliver us from the night.
Joy comes through the mourning.
                       -Sherrill Schlimpert

             

      

LIGHT in the Darkness

      On this quiet winter night, I finally have slowed down enough after the holidays to write what has become my semi-annual blog.  It's been mulling in my mind for the past month like aging wine.   My thoughts keep being drawn to one word.  It seems that's the way God talks to me.  A word comes to my attention that I keep noticing.   This time it's Light.  The word light.   Somehow I just began to notice the concept of light which seemed to give me pause. I began to notice a message forming in my mind whenever I would see the Christmas lights on the houses and mantles and trees.  But that wasn't all.  I kept noticing it.  There was the star of Bethlehem.  And the shepherds who the glory of the Lord shone about them.  And the Magic Tree at church.  And the advent candles lit one by one.

     John tells us that "Through Him all things were made...In Him was life, and that life was the light of men.  The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it."  John 1: 3 -5. Jesus himself uses the word light often:  "Believe in the light while you have the light, so that you may become children of light. " John 12:36

      Shouldn't children of light notice the light?   I think now on the miracle that light is.  A sunrise.  The moon.  The flame of an open fire.  A beam of sunlight streaming in through the window.  The rainbow that forms as the hose watering flowers hits the light just right on summer day.  The child born out of the womb of darkness into the light of day.  And even though scientists have found a way to harness electricity - the electric light is still a marvel.
   
     Can we understand any of these?  Do we become so accustomed to the light that our hearts are darkened to the miracle of it?   Are we children of light that have become entitled to its luxury?

     Yet, we all have known darkness.  Darkness in the night.  Darkness in the wrestling of our soul.  Darkness in evil and hate and sickness, hurt and suffering and bullying and persecution.  Darkness in betrayal and disappointment, in politics, in crime and broken relationships.

     But when goodness and beauty and light prevail, even for a moment,  why are we not amazed and thankful?   Or have our eyes become accustomed to the darkness?   Do we even seek the light?  The true Light?  Or just shadows that momentarily satisfy?  Do we  only seek the thrill of man-made lights in a sports stadium or a rock band's strobe or the flicker of the latest blockbuster movie screen?

     There are many glimpses of light and goodness on this earth that give us a taste of heaven.  For it is only God who created light out of darkness.  "The earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep... And God said, "Let there be light and there was light.  God saw that the light was good and He separated the light from darkness."  Genesis 1: 2-4.  In 2 Corinthians 4:6 we're told,  "For God who said, "Let the light shine out of darkness, made the light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God's glory displayed in the face of Christ."

     And His Son said clearly,  "I am the light of the world."

     How many sunsets and sunrises do I not stop to see because I am scurrying around with my heart and plans attached to the dark earth?   How many times do my thoughts turn dark because I am not looking to the One who is the light?   How many times is the true Light dimmed against lights of the tv or computer or phone screen that my eyes are glued to?

     Having just been in the dark pit of lethargy and lack of  any zest for life that sinus infections always seem to throw me into, I am especially sensitive to the light of health right now - so thankful to be feeling life.  Any spark of joy, of appreciation, of comfort is like a ray of sunshine permeating the gray of sickness that dulls the senses.  Yet, I know this was just a semi-darkness -  many in this world are in their own types of  smothering darkness -  suffering from black clouds that are emotional, relational, financial or physical.  And yet, without darkness would the light shine as bright?

     Years ago the motivational speaker Zig Ziglar suggested the concept of go-lights. That whenever we stopped at a stoplight, it would be the time to give a green light in our mind to some positive thoughts.  Positive thoughts can certainly add a pre-dawn type of light to the world but they are night-lights compared to the glory of the Lord.  In first Peter 2:9 we are told that we are "a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light."   Shouldn't  that give us cause to have the light of joy in our hearts even on the darkest day?

     For 2 Peter 1:19 also cautions us that "we also have the prophetic message as something completely reliable, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns, and the morning star rises in your hearts."  In the midst of all the rancor and hate and bitterness that spews darkness into our days on this earth - the greed and self-seeking sin of man that has been alive and well since the prince of darkness was allowed to roam on it - why don't we seek after the light with all our might?  The wise men traveled over 500 miles by camel following the star, can we just stop and seek the light in our bible, our churches, our hearts?

     The morning star rises within me tonight just by taking the time to turn off the tv and sit in the light of the fireplace.  It happened by simply taking the time to turn my heart from the darkness of the world - to turn off the barking heads that spew what they think is enlightenment, sure that their solutions will  light the world - though they never seem to.   And more than just turning toward some earthly warmth in the light  of a quiet evening in front of the fire - turning toward THE LIGHT.  THE LIGHT that works miracles in the darkest of hearts - that sparks love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Gal. 5).  THE  REAL LIGHT that I have  personally seen turn lives around, spark forgiveness, reconciliation, and compromise, that can take away the addicts burning drive, that can bring peace out of confusion, and harmony out of disscordance.  THE REAL LIGHT that comes when we take our eyes off of complaining about the darkness in the world to focus on "whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- (and) think on these things  (Phil.  4:8.)

     I am thankful for this fascination with light of lately that has come upon me unbidden - because it has pointed me once again to the Light that holds all the answers, the Light of the world.  But even more than that -  the Light that gives us hope in  the midst of the darkness  -  the light that will shine when Revelation 2:25 tells us that "there will be no more light.  They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light.  And they will reign for ever and ever." 

     I choose to be a child of the light - and stand here amazed to be able to be.


SEE THE LIGHT

Come and see, 
THE LIGHT is here
To light the night
And calm our fear.

The wise men came.
They saw the star.
Even Herod believed them
As they came from afar.  

A King was born
In the dark of the night.
His GLORY shone.
Shepherds cowered in fright.

But they need not have feared 
The light of angels praising a Savior born,
Whose death one day 
Caused the curtain to be torn.

For LIGHT had arrived!
All mankind inclined
To hear this story
That has withheld the test of time.

They hear the story.
But do they see
THE LIGHT that has come
To you and me?

The prisoner set free.
The alcoholic now dry.
The believer on his deathbed
No longer afraid to die.

The flame not extinguished 
By tyranny and rule
The passion that oppression
Cannot quench and cool.  

Darekness abounds.
But THE LIGHT is no tale.
The angels at the tomb 
Announced in light He'll prevail.

So listen -
Come and see THE LIGHT
That warms the soul 
And lights the night.

THE LIGHT of the world
Is plain to see
But only from vantage point
Of bended knee.   


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A Mud Pie Mindset

                 
                    

                                Mud pies                   

     

Majesty

       Mud pies or Majesty?  Many ideas come to me  that I think I should blog on but somehow they never get to the page, as is evident from my last post 6 months ago.  But this quote by C. S. Lewis stopped me dead in my tracks this morning, even though I've heard it many times,  and it finally sat me down to write:  “It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half- hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

     How often do we continue to look down at our world, trying to fix it, blame it, and look to it to satisfy, when what we need to do is  not try to fix our circumstances only but to FIRST look to the hills "from which cometh our help"? (Is. 40:26)  C.S. Lewis also said that he found in himself a desire which no experience in the world can quench...that we were meant for another world...and that earthly pleasures were never meant to satisfy it, but only to arouse it, to suggest the real thing.  

     Maybe these insights too me aback in a new way because of my recentstudy of Psalm 91.  This psalm is near and dear to me becaues of finding that it calmed my mother when she was in the throws of depression and turmoil after a thyroid cancer surgery years ago.  This psalm according to the book Psalm 91: God's Shield of Protection by Ruth & Shrum, is called The Soldier's Psalm.  It told of General George C. Marshall, Army Chief of Staff in WWII who said:  "I saw firsthand what happens when belief in the Almighty God flodds the hearts and soulds of men and women rushing into battle.  This supreme confidence in God is not foxhold religion or superficial faith - it is a life-changing decision to place oneself in the loving hands of Him who is greater than the battlefield."

         In this psalm we are told, "You will not fear the terror of the night."The book goes on to illuminate this passage by suggesting that:  When our eyes are not on God, fear will come.  But let that fear be a reminder to repent.  We walk by faith and not by sight.  (2 Cor. 5:7). 
We have to choose to believe what we see.  Not that we deny the existence of the attack, for the attack may be very real.  But God wants our faith in His Word to become more of a reality to us than what we see in the natural.  Faith does not deny the existence of terror, but there are simply higher laws in the bible for overcoming it.  

     It is so easy to forget that we are told in Psalm 91:4 that he who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the almighty.  Therefore Ruth & Shum go on to remind us to:  open our minds with the determination to stand firm and refuse to entertain fearful thoughts.  What we allow our mind to dwell on is our choice.  Therefore, if we desire to operate in this protection covenant, taking authority over negative thoughts and emotions is imperative.  It is amazing how the simple phrase, "I am just not going there." can provide the shield to dispel those fear thoughts just as the blood of the lamb provided passover and also provided immunity from the Egyptian plagues in the land of Goshen.  

     Then in a study at church this morning I was reminded that:  All persons everywhere have a deep, inner sense that God exists.  Paul says even Gentile unbelievers "knew God" but did not honor him or give thanks to him.  All have the opportunity to seek Him.  The Bible says there  is something called foolishness that destroys our sense of God's reality.  This foolishness often seeks to have faith in ideologies that will solve all the world's problems.   Not that we don't need to pursue earthly resolutions to earthly problems,  but we often look past God's hand in it all. 

    There have been a few people in the history of the world that have caused men to ask, "Who are you?" Buddha and Gandhi and Jesus are among them.  People who knew them well had never seen such compassion and integrity and wisdom in anyone else.  Yet  Buddha or Gandhi never professed to be God.  Buddha himself said, "Don't worship me."  But Jesus said, "I am the way and the truth and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me."  (John 14:6)  Christians are accused today of a narrow-minded intolerance.  This faith should never result in anything but love,  but the fact is - it is either right or wrong.  It is either THE way, or it is not.  For them to state that is not intolerance, but truth.  However, they must earn the relationship status to have the right to state their beliefs in order to do this in a respectful, appropriate way.  at are the chances that an explosion in a print factory would produce Hamlet?  In the same way, when we look at the world there is far more order and beauty and design than in the book of Hamlet. How can we possibly believe in the Big Bang Theory with no authority behind it?  Jesus claimed to be God and Creator of this intricate world.  He set the world on its ear for those who would listen and those who would not in three short years.  The biggest question then came:  What are you betting your life on?

     It has taken me years to begin to understand what surrender means,  to begin to be content in the face of not getting my way or in unanswered prayer that is hard to understand how it could not be pleasing to God to grant - prayers for myself or friends of health issues, marriage issues, children issues, relationship issues, financial issues, governmental issues - all causing pain and suffering in unimaginable ways.  My daughter's friends had a 9 month old baby die of a brain tumor - how can it be God's will to  allow this?  But if it causes these precious parents to seek God's comfort - can we not see how from God's point of view He gets both their souls as well as this little one who I firmly believe now resides in heaven - and that His love could be seen  in the opportunity for the outpouring of love for them from their family and friends?   Those same parents are now are sponsoring a run to raise money for childhood cancer that helps us see one outcome of Romans 8:28 - that all things work together for good to those who love the Lord.  Of course we are told to walk by faith and not by sight (2 Cor. 5:7) so on this side of heaven we may never see God's workings in these matters.  Still we are given much insight on suffering in His word:   For we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character, character, hope.  (Rom. 5:3) and in Heb. 1 2:7 where we are called to: endure hardship as discipline, and  in James 1:2 - Consider it pure joy...whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith provides perseverance.   These are but a few.  

     

     But one of the greatest testimonies of God's provision for help in times of trouble come from friends that have endured much hardship with their faith and dignity intact - with the authenticity to admit that their sufferings often cause them to question but that over and over they have seen His mercy and comfort as He intervenes in their hearts if not always in their circumstances.  To me these heart miracles of being able to persevere in the midst of some of life's greatest tragedies are the greatest evidence to me that the "peace that passes understanding" mentioned in Phil. 4 is given and available as the result of great faith,  and that God does answer our prayers with His Presence always. He never promised to fix everything in this world, but He did promise to be with us always. I have told you these things so that you may have peace.  In this world there will be trouble, but take heart for I have overcome the world.  John 16: 33. 

     Another place I see evidence of a "majestic mindset"  - one that has a heavenly perspective is when I see civil and respectful discourse in the face of our current toxic political situation even when addressing opposing sides of an argument.  Thankfully it isn't always Christians that can exhibit this ability.   Sometimes I wonder if God doesn't allow for certain issues even in the bible that may be subject to interpretation resulting in differing denominations and theological discussions. He also gives no clear insights into big cultural questions that many claim to have His insight  on - ones that have many sides to them such as abortion.  He created different skin colors, and cultures, and personalities - all just to test us on the ability to follow the instruction of Romans 12:18:  Insofar as you are able, live at peace with everyone.  None of these foundational principles of Christianity are unclear.  Another crystal clear instruction is in James 1 - Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires...Those who consider themselves religious yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongue deceive themselves and their religion is worthless.  Religion that God our Father accepts is this:  to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.   

     I could go on but that's another blog for another day that hopefully doesn't take 6 months.  But back to keeping a mindset that is not derailed by the pleasures or injustices of this world - one that does not forsake its first love. (see Rev. 2:4)  and one that lifts its eyes to the heavens (Is. 40:26 and 51:6).  Of course we must look down at the world to live in it.  One of the first precepts of the life coaching program amplified in Katie Brazelton's Pathway to Purpose is to Do What Matter Today. We must do what we can in this world.  We are told to feed the hungry and care for widows and orphans and to give to Caesar what is Caesar's - thereby being politically informed and serving in the world where we are called. But we must always do it in the shadow of His wings, lifting our eyes to the heavens with each suffering, each call to arms, each setback, each need to speak the truth in love, each word we speak, and each step and we take in this world.

Back to Psalm 51 which is but one help to arm us to do this in the face of tormenting obstacles:  

Psalm 91:  A Psalm of Refuge

He who dwells in the shelter of the High,

Will abide in the LORD's shadow.  

He will be our refuge,

Therefore, where else shall we go? 

It is He that delivers from the evil one

With his deadly traps and snares.

When His wings provide a refuge,

Why go anywhere else with our cares?

We need not fear the terror of the night,

Or the arrows that fly by day,

For His faithfulness is a shield,

To protect us on our way.

No evil will befall you,

For He will give His angels charge 

     concerning you,

He will guard you in all your ways.

He will deliver you.

For to those who have loved Him,

He sets securely on High.

Those who know His name

Will be saved and never die.

He has said,  "In your day of trouble,

I will answer if you call upon Me.  

Let us be covered by his pinions,

To dwell with Him saved and free. 

     

      


                        

Opening the Gift

                 

           I still love snow days as much as I did when I was a student and later as a teacher.  A snow day seemed like a gift of a morning of quiet, one in which I didn't have to rush and press like most mornings.  Snow days are simply days when time stands still, and what is on the calendar no longer matters,  where peace on earth seems tangible in the moment upon awakening to snow covering the world like a virgin white blanket - when all is calm, all is bright - that is, until the traffic turns the roads to ugly grey slush and the rat race picks up its pace once more.

           It was on one such morning before Christmas this year that God used the anointed words of Anne Voskamp in her book The Greatest Gift to slow my world -weary spirit this season.  Her words took me above the anxieties over things that many in the world would call blessings to have such things to worry about.  Blessings - to have the means and energy to have a Christmas dinner for 19 people in my small group - to have over 60 friends to send cards to - to have a car that only needs an oil change (but needs it NOW before our Christmas trip, in the midst of packing and preparing) - to have the means to buy presents (even if they did need wrapping and I've discovered I can no longer sit on the floor to do so!)  I certainly needed to be reminded yet again of another of Anne's books, One Thousand Gifts as I dare to let the gifts I've been given allow the Giver to fade into the background of my life and the details of the world become the focus of my life.

         But God has used the newest creativity of this soul sister I don't even know personally to touch my earth-bound spirit with her new book and to remind me that this world is NOT all there is!!!  We forget in His Sovereignty that He allows the darts of the devil - be they minor annoyances or grave tragedies  - to remind us that He is God and we are not - that we must remember He works ALL things to good those who are called to His purpose (Rom. 8:28)- yes even the worst atrocities we see on the news of what's happening in this dark world.

          We cannot begin to see past our pain  to understand His ways - or see that hate crimes or cancer or kids with dehibilitating special needs can possibly be used to good.  But we can look at Paul singing praises in jail and the apostles joyfully telling the good news in the face of martyrdom, or Corrie Ten Boom or Joni Tada Erickson writing books about how faith got them through prison camps or becoming a quadrapalegic.  Only now in reflection can we see how the awful suffering of those followers speak volumes still, years and centuries later - proclaiming the power of God's glory that can take the weakest humans through the most terrible storms.

         THAT is the gift we needed to have unwrapped this Christmas,  one that won't be forgotten like the wrapping paper now long banished to the trash and the decorations shoved back into their boxes, one that will be used every day and hour of the coming year.  How pitiful to take a gift of unestimatable worth and let it get jostled  to the back of our lives - letting it get lost in the shuffle of the trinkets and baubles and busyness of our lives.  For here we have no lasting kingdom. We journey to heaven where we're fully known ...the words from an old hymn that came wafting through the cobwebs of past hopes to remind me I can have that hope today.

           Yes, today - in these uncertain times - with the world growing smaller - and nuclear weapons attainable to more powers - and dissension and hate and division - and Democrats, and Republicans and Liberatarians so sure their views are right that they can project the future even in the complicated nuances of economics and trying to make sense of history and the current news - and judge others who don't see the forecast as they do.

           To be sure, there was  bickering among the apostles causing these verses to be written for our edification: Titus 3:9 - Avoid foolish controversies... and arguments and quarrels about the law because these are unprofitable and useless and 2 Tim 2:23 - Have nothing to do with stupid arguments because they produce quarrels. The Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.  Those who oppose him he must gently instruct...  They even complained about how others were preaching the gospel but Paul tells them in Phil. 1:17-18 - The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely...But what does it matter?  The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached.

           Perhaps God allowed this world to be so complicated that even  His followers would have cause to disagree - and so He allows all of the differences and viewpoints and grey areas whether in life or theology or politics to give us cause to have our love and faith tested because then His glory will shine more brightly against the darkness of dissension and chaous.

          This is where in the dark of a winter morning Anne Voskamp's words cut thrugh the clutter and maddness of the world's cacaphoney and spoke to my heart - "We read the world's headlines and wonder:  If there's a God who really cares, He'd look at this world and His heart would break.  And God looks to the cross...and says, "My heart did."...Gen. 6:6 tells us (after God started over with the flood) that "His heart was filled with pain." And Christ comes like an ark, like a cradle over floods. Every flood of stress is an invitation to get into the ark of our Savior.  Every flood of troubles remakes the topography of our souls, making us better or bitter...Jesus claims those who are wandering and wondering and wounded and worn out as His.  He grafts you into His line and His story and His heart and He gives you His name, His lineage, His righeousness.  He graces you with plain grace.  ...Is there a greater gift you could want or need or have?...Christ comes right to your Christmas tree and looks at your family tree and says, "I am your God and I am one of you, and I'll be the Gift and I'll take you.  Take me?  This is the story that's been coming for you since the beginning.  And you could wake on Christmas to only grasp that you never took the whole of the Gift. So now we pause. Still.  Ponder. Hush.  Wait.  - for the Gift who was pierced for you, wounded, who unfolds Himself on the Tree as your endless, greatest Gift.

            And so on this quiet morning, I stop to check that I will not have entered the new year with the greatest gift left unopened. But that, as I return to the cold, noisy, annoying hassles of living, that I remember I have a Gift, the greatest Gift, singing to my soul: silent night, all is calm, all is well in the midst of it all.

Silent morn, holy morn
All is well, all is calm.
Round yon world though noisy and mad
Has come a gift to make us glad,

Walk in heavenly peace.  Walk in heavenly peace.

Silent heart, holy heart
Stop and still, midst the mess
Of racial strife and  different views
Of how to deal with the worldly news,

Walk in heavenly peace.  Walk in heavenly peace.

Silent words, holy words,
Stop and think before you speak,
Silence words of judgement and scorn,
Speak only words  that from His are born.

Walk in heavenly peace.  Walk in heavenly peace.

Listen, Listen my World Weary Spirit

I love pictures of paths - as you might guess from the name of my blog - Pathway to Peace.  This picture of a winter path is a visualization of my walk right now.  It's a picture of the stuff of the season closing in on me after a fall of not feeling well.  I'm better, but the evil one still uses my feelings of panic from so many years of wondering if my energy would hold out while battling chronic illness that is thankfully only chronic but seldom acute - years of fibromyalgia, and now Epstein-Barre numbers that signify a low-end infection of mono.

I noticed that I wrote on the Christmas season and the New Year back in 2010 when I first started blogging.  I invite you to go back and use those as devotionals during this season - as these were seasons where God seemed to share something with me that felt noteworthy enough to share with others.   And though I go through seasons of doing where I don't write much, it seems that God always gives me an altar-experience just when I wonder if I'll ever have one again - like those of the Israelites when God showed up and they built an altar to recognize His provision.   And when I'm allowed one of those - where you just feel like God has spoken - (how do I explain this, except to those of you that know what I mean?)  I always feel the need to record it, because I know how fleeting it can seem - AND how easily I forget what I've "heard".

Just this morning I had a tiny return glimpse of a morning I had a week or so ago when God just showed up in my quiet time.  It was a morning where I was reflecting on the low-level anxiety and malaise that comes when my mono numbers go up - and reveling that I was beginning to come out of that state again.  I sat in the dark right before dawn asking God what I needed to have learned from that dark season of fall where I just went through the  motions of life, feeling little joy and having seemingly no revelations in response to my prayers.

I was inspired to write a poem that day, something I haven't done much of in the past season of busyness -  life-coaching private and Love Inc clients, and Stephen's ministry and teaching Children's Lit at the junior college, and facilitating a bible study.  It was a poem that just reminded me to LISTEN - to wait for a thought bubble that seems unusual - not a normal thought pattern.  Or to wait for a minute vacation - a moment to thank God for the abilily to feel joy in a moment, maybe even in a sunbeam or a  tree-lined lane in the fall, or a cozy cloudy day that I can be at home, or even a made bed and a bedroom that is in order, a sanctuary at the end of a day.

I noticed after this fall of low-level blahness - not having the energy to do much besides get through my days (which I should be thankful that I could still do!!!)  that I had lost my joy.  But there was one day  I came out of my closet and looked at my made bed and the pretty bedroom I get to retire to at the end of the day and thanks for that moment welled up within me.  What is this unaccustomed feeling?  Joy!   It seemed so long since I had recognized beauty.

And today, when driving to class, realizing I needed some caffeine to get into the morning, it might have been the caffeine -  but I saw a truck on the outer road of the highway that just looked like it was driving in a postcard scene, that made me think of God and thank Him for that momentary glimpse of beauty.  I turned off the radio spouting political insights, and let thoughts of my Savior replace my world weariness.

This led my thoughts to the choir special we used to sing and that included that term: world- weariness. That song spoke to me the first time I heard it years ago and I still use it  to get into my quiet time, especially on walks.  I share it with you now, and though you may not be familiar with the tune, I invite you to really listen to the words.  I think the title is True Contentment,

Listen, Listen my world weary spirit,
A voice midst the clamor is calling low.
How sweet the whisper of my dear Savior.
His word calms my worries,
His life makes me whole.

Let go, let go, my earth-bound spirit.
The One who is wiser is calling low,
His wisdom is higher than my finite reason.
Faithfully follow and you will not fall.

The world is shouting for my affection,
With promise of pleasure
And treasures of gold.
Yet still my heart knows that true contentment
Is only by trusting and resting of soul.

Wisdom and strength grant to me Holy Spirit,
To walk in this kingdom but not call it home.
For here I have no lasting treasure.
I journey to heaven where I'm fully known.

And so I also share what came to me another morning this fallwhen after a long season of silence, where the warm sun turned into cooler days and the leaves fell off the trees and my energy seemed to fade with them, I "heard" God again, just as I did this morning telling me I could find joy  - even though it was one of those mornings that needed a God-start as well as a caffeine jolt.  This is the same message that has been stirring my heart through the pages of John Eldredge's book Walking with God which I highly recommend and which had to be a God-incidence - no coincidence - that that book came into my hands just at the right time to help me come out of this past season of cloudy fall-like slowness.

What came was  reminder to LISTEN, that as I am less productive as the years continue to slow me, that I should not find discomfort in that, but rest in the opportunity to listen more.

Listen,...His voice can creep slowly into your consciousness
    as imperceptively as the dawn creeps  over the darkness.
Imperceptively...Your whisper comes...I must slow to catch it, 
   strain in silence to hear.
Silence is suddenly replaced with a flutter in my heart - 
   a word from Him -  a new perception.
Thoughts form into an impression that gels and 
     I must pause to catch it and translate it into words. 
     It is not from my mind.  It is unique - a transformed thought -
     a renewing of my mind.
Enlightenment and Encouragement come as I recognize Your voice.  
     No, this is not from me. I cannot force or expect when You will speak.  
     There are days and seasons I must wait on You to speak -
     when I must rely on the written Word You have given to all Your children - 
     that I must  renew and write on my heart diligently 
     as You reveal new and deeper meaning for each new day. 
     And I must write these personal revelations - 
     capture them before my heart and life go on without them.
Now - now, I must take these insights from You and Your marching orders
     and step back into my life, step by step, living and serving AND listening.  
     Listening and waiting and praising and thanking. 

Our Father's Hand

I'm convinced that everyone needs their Mary times. Those are times beyond the daily bread of quiet time or even extended times of retreat or study - stolen times to just sit at the feet of Jesus in awe of  the overwhelming, enveloping peace that passes understanding. The peace that is only found there.

I had one of those moments sitting on the rocks of Johnson Shut-Ins - an amazing rock formation on the Black River in Missouri that allows small waterfalls and pools to occur in the course of about a quarter mile.

The above picture isn't me, but it is a similar perch to what I had recently,  My daughter and family were picking their way downstream, crawling over rocks and sliding down small waterfalls.  I had found a perfect smooth rock from which to watch their progress.  And then - almost freeze-framed - I watched in between the large boulders where my 6 year old grandson strained to reach over a small but turbulent rapid to reach his father's outstretched hand.

And there it happened - a flash of insight - one of those a-ha moments where life makes sense if only for a moment.  In a flash, the simple picture that we can navigate this life with its torrents and rapids to the next safe foothold our Heavenly Father extends us, suddenly became clear.  I watched the same scenario of hundreds of state-park revelers in small groups helping one another make their way amongst the rocks.  And it occured to me that this is the answer to the ills of society: if each one would just help one, then the issues of taxes and welfare, broken homes producing broken children, and terrorism and immigration, Black Lives Matter, and locked congresses would find answers in compromise and extended mercy. Oversimplied - maybe- but a target to aim for nevertheless.  If we would just be ready to extend a hand in fellowship, give an ear to listening even to an opposing view, maybe we would see glimpses of solutions clouded by our own perspective that we are completely right.

Then I lifted my eyes downsteam to the glassy pond where the surging water fell to smoothness after leaving the detours and valleys of the rocks.  I looked up and onto the rock cliffs, the green foilage of the surrounding trees which met blue sky as a background for flying birds and white clouds.  I was overcome in that moment with God's glory displayed in creation where all the craziness of the world faded into the background of that beauty.

How many times do I not slow down to capture these Mary moments not only in my inconsistent blog?  Moreover, how many times do I miss them completely in my hurried life, running around doing Martha tasks?

I know there are different seasons and times of day for serving and resting.  For me, there are different blocks of time for writing, for being a grandma, for fellowship.  There are seasons of leaving on vacation, and seasons of routine at home, times of busyness and times for quiet and rest.

But there is always time to squeeze in a Mary moment by just taking a break to stop the motion of life to look at God's creation - whether it be a tree or sunset, be it summer or winter or fall.  There is always time to take a moment - to sit at His feet and feel the peace that He and only He brings.

Sitting at His Feet

Sitting at His feet I get a glimpse 
Of what the Mary in the gospel felt
When she let the world fade away 
    from her conscious
And simply at His feet she knelt.

Not succumbing to the pressure
Of what Martha and the world may expect,
But prioritizing the moment 
She had with our Lord to connect.

Maybe it was just a few moments
Or maybe the luxury of more,
But she knew the importance of resting
And take advantage of the offered rapport...

When she could drink in the peace of His Presence
By putting all else aside.
She looked beyond the moment
And stopped all else to abide.

In this world where peace is so hidden,
Where hatred and slander prevail,
Let us find Him our oasis of wisdom
So that our lives will tell the tale...

That we've got something special
   residing within us,
Something the world may not understand.
We've got the Spirit of Love to guide
But only if we hold on to His hand.

Bigger, Faster, Stronger

Seriously, those were the words I woke up to this morning. They popped into my mind from nowhere.  They were the words written on the tshirts of my son when he was in his high school football program. Bigger, Faster, Stronger. Push, train, reach for success was the idea behind the motto. 

I spent this past weekend facilitating a life plan for an amazing Christian woman whose main 

goal in life was to become a mature woman of God and live out her purpose as a leader of a non-profit teen mentoring program and a Life Purpose Coach.  What a privilege to have a front row seat into looking at this woman's struggles and successes!  As I watched her past, present and action steps for the future unfold, I was impressed with her stamina to persevere, and with her clear ideas of small steps to become more consistent and intentional with her waking moments.  

I couldn't help but think of how many mornings, instead of letting God lead me to put words down on paper which is the way I hear Him best, whether it be in blog form or life journal or prayer journal , I forego the privilege and lose my ability to persevere in seeking Him.  I'm loving sitting in His presence, letting Him guide my thoughts this morning.  So, why don't I do that every morning?

We're told clearly in Hebrews 12:1:  Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.  And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.  For the joy set before Him He endured the cross. 

But what of the times when this is more the picture?  What about those mornings where getting out of bed at all takes extreme perseverance?

What about those seasons I wrote of in the last blog?  Isn't it okay to have seasons of productivity and service interspersed with seasons of rest?  As I look back on my last seasons, I had a fall of busy, joyful service and productivity followed by a long winter of not feeling well and just plodding.  This spring I feel energized to write again and plan new projects, and be excited about the prospect of another new client on the horizon instead of wondering if I've got the energy.  

As Hebrews told us, Jesus is the pioneer of our faith, our model.  Yes, he persevered.  We see him in the pages of the Word getting up early to pray and to walk the dusty roads fulfilling His purpose.  But we also see Him rest peacefully even in the storm. The Bible gives us another example of resting when Elijah confessed his exhaustion from running for his life in Kings 19:  I have had enough Lord. Take my life.  Then he lay down and fell asleep.  It was then that the Lord sent him an angel to tell him to get up and eat,  He did, and lay down again.  Once again the angel said, "Get up and eat for the journey is too much for you."  This time he was strengthened and heard God's command to get up and stand on the mountain where he was rewarded with God's gentle whisper with direction for his next steps.  

Notice that even in our rest we must eat and drink and listen for the Lord.  Never are we to rest or serve so much that we don't persevere in our time with the Lord.  But we also don't have to set action steps that are so rigid and prescribed and lofty that they don't include listening for His guidance of when to move forward and when to lay low.  For me there are days and maybe seasons of getting up and blogging as He fills my mind with inspiration for the journey and my cup runneth over and I want to share.  For me there are times of serving with all my might, when I get to coach and do life plans and retreats, and facilitate bible studies.  And then there are times when I just pray and study and eat and drink in, waiting for a word again, when exhaustion or the weaknesses of my immune system that seems to be my form of Paul's thorn slow me down.  

For you, there may be different kinds of productivity, for our purposes are all different.  For years, my productivity was spent in teaching and mothering and being a wife and serving where I could at church.  There had to be times of rest and there was no room for serving like I do in this season of life.  But there were also times of laziness when I got up after my rest but didn't eat and drink from His Word enough to persevere fully.  And I became sluggish and not peaceful in my rest.

What is behind the  Bigger, Faster, Stronger  motto is the training, the rest, the nutrition that also go into being a successful athlete.  It's not just the working out part that it seems to imply.  I pray that I will continue to eat well daily nutritionally to do all I can to stay well physically, getting my rest and down time.  And to eat well spiritually never skipping my daily intake of Him in some form, so that I truly will persevere in all areas of my unique purpose and be Bigger, Faster, and Stronger for His kingdom. 

Run the Race with Endurance 

Bigger, faster, stronger!

We're told at every turn.

Persevere, get better!

Study, pray and learn!

Serve Him! Use your gifts!

Have quiet time! Press on!

Be fruitful! Be intentional! 

And get up at dawn!

All words of wisdom.

But we must hear it all.

And must walk with Him

And listen lest we fall.

He doesn't give us formulas,

And a schedule that's prescribed.

He just wants us to walk with Him

And daily in Him imbibe.

For life is never easy,

Never constant in its flow,

It's dark and light and good and bad.

We can't be in the know

Of how He wants us to walk each day.

If we did, we wouldn't need Him so.

He'd set us on our path 

And we'd blindly know how to go.

Instead of bigger, faster, stronger 

In our ways and accomplishments.

Just to remain in contact should be 

The point of our perseverance.

Then He'll show us when to push or rest

Only if we quietly stay

At His feet waiting 

The marching orders of each day.

.  

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